Another week has passed.  Time flies so much and it's hard to put it to good use.  I came home from our little camping trip to the Trossochs feeling very refreshed in both mind, body and soul.  It was so good to be close to creation again and I love "living" outdoors, although we did have the luxury of our new tent to try out.  The biking was fab - especially the cycle around some of Loch Katrine after taking the ferry out some of the way.  There is something spectacular about Scottish scenery which exudes mystery, history and romance.  So good.

On the second night of our camping trip the moon was stunning.  I have always encouraged my family, when we are apart, to see the moon as a connection with each other.  To quote John Denver "and the moon and the stars are the same ones we see, it's the same old sun up in the sky".  When we are apart and feel sad, we can look at the moon and take comfort in the fact that our loved one can see exactly the same moon we are looking at, though they be 1000s of miles away.

While I was standing watching the incredible reflection of the moon on the tranquil water, I noticed a ripple starting to appear and move upstream.  Slowly an otter came leisurely swimming right past where I was standing and further up the river, without a care in the world.  It was a very special moment.

Taking the bikes on the ferry up Loch Katrine and cycling back was a fantastic trip.  The history of the shores we passed during the ferry trip then the spectacular views from the cycle back along the north shore.  All so refreshing to body, mind and soul.  These are such good reasons to be alive.  Making the effort to get out there into a place of such natural beauty gives enough positive energy to take me through a the next few months.  God's creation is perfect (except where we have spoiled it)

Another stitch in my year of repair was precious time spent with my sister who came up to spend the weekend.  We were raised by amazing parents who loved us very much and we miss them so.  We know they are in Heaven and we know they both were ready to go but we there is an unfillable void left.  Grief comes in waves and hits hard at times, but we 3 sisters have a great relationship and so can share our grief openly and healthily.  The healing process from grief takes time, and indeed will never be completely finished, but this last weekend marked another milestone on this journey for both of us.  Visiting the grave, nice walks with lots of things to talk about/observe.  Nothing like a sister to tread life's path with.

So, reflecting back on the week.  There have been many positives and many steps on my repair journey.  There have been negatives too - mostly in terms of eating habits.  10k preparation has been OK.  2 long walks, 2 spin sessions (I am loving spin), 1 Yoga sessions, 1 run on the treadmill and another run planned for tomorrow after watching the London Marathon.  Onwards and upwards............

As I return again to this blog, it is after a tough few years but a few years where I have learned a lot about myself and what I can achieve.  Run and be mum means so much more now than a mum who runs.  It embraces that but also takes in motherhood and how hard it is to "run" the gauntlet of all the demands on a mother's time.  After a difficult few years culminating in the death of both my parents, 18 months apart, I am now entering what I see as my time of repair.  I call 2019 my year of repair.  This repair will hopefully, reach into all areas of life and relationship but it is mostly my year of repair to myself.  Physically, mentally, spiritually and emotionally.  How I will achieve this is still to be seen but one of the first steps on the way is to believe in myself again and book a place in the Glasgow 10k in September.  Another step was to buy myself and e-bike and I have already done a few trips on it to places new.  The photo above is White Laggan Bothy.

Self belief is so important and I have it in abundance in some areas of life but am sadly lacking in others.  Encouragement from other people is very important to me, as I see encouraging others as an important part of my personality.  I need external encouragement but part of my year of repair is learning to become expert at encouraging myself. 

I have a 10k run on Wednesday which is where most people go to get a fast time!!  I'll probably run my slowest time ever but I just have to get my head round that as see this as a training run.  I went out today with the plan to do 7 miles on hilly Galloway roads and was really pleased to get it done a little faster than I expected and to manage without too much pain.  It's all part of the bigger plan.  Nothing now until Troon 10k on Wednesday and then onwards and upwards!!

I have suddenly started to get excited about my marathon training which I have now officially started.  I am using the Jeff Galloway marathon training program which means I will run/walk the whole marathon and Jeff's whole training programme focuses on one long run a week and 2 short runs.  I will also be doing Yoga, badminton, strength and circuits each week.  I will be eating a healthier diet (which I should have done all winter but not looking back) and will keep my mind focused on the goal.  It has to be a priority for the next few months.  On Saturday I ran Heaton Park Park run and tried a 30:30 run/walk ratio which was based on my magic mile.  I got 45.25 according to park run but I was a long way from the narrow start and my garmin registered 44.17 which is 2 minutes fast than my last one, although 9 minutes longer than my pb!!!  Anyway - onwards and upwards.  This morning I tried some strength exercises with my resistance band and they were really hard.  So they should help my strength.

Needed to do a 30 minute run today but am in a really relaxed "I want to do nothing" mood.  Made myself get out of the door and persuaded my 12yos to come with me.  We are staying in Oxfordshire and were exposed to an unfriendly native who didn't seem to realise that bridleways can be used for more than just horse riding!   However, it was a good couple of miles, slow pace in a 30/30 ratio and very muddy but good to be able to tick that one off.  Been reading lots more around clean eating and how to really understand why I want to be more healthy - hopefully leading to more healthy eating and a healthier body.  Onwards and upwards.

Well it's been a good long while since I posted on this blog. So much has happened inbetween and I am where I wanted to be in some ways but definitely not in others. I have achieved so much in some things. However, my running and weight are definitely not where they could have been had I been more consistent. In order to sort this out I have booked myself to run/walk (jeff) a marathon in October 2018. I will be jeffing York marathon on 14th October and I will be really happy to do it in 6.30 hours. I also aim to be more in control of what I eat. Life is busy and so fitting it in is really hard but it will just take sheer determination. Its really now or never.

2016

Many thoughts go through my head as each new year comes along. Mostly this year I feel disappointment with myself for not continuing with my journey to be more healthy.
I do have reasonable excuse. Life is busy.  I am working a lot and want to spend time with the family. I can't run easily with anyone else and responsibilities with frail parents is a further pull on my time. It's important that Rick achieves his running goals because of how much he does at home.
But some how I want and need to find the time to fit my own goals in and the strength to eat healthily. I give myself so many excuses but I need to get on with this.  On my 51st birthday I ran/walked 5.8 miles and had a great time. I have to tell myself I am not too old to pick it up again!